September 19th, 1950
Hinako: This is my parent’s room… isn’t it?
Junko (child): She told them she wanted to play house, but they wouldn’t let her.
Mother: Oh my. That’s unfortunate…
Hinako (child): They wouldn’t let me play because I played with the boys!
Junko (child): Who wouldn’t let you play? Tell me and I’ll give them a piece of my mind later!
Mother: That’s enough, Junko. But all this just because she played with boys…
Hinako (child): I hate girls! I don’t wanna be a girl! I wanna be a boy!
Mother: Hinako always enjoyed playing with both girls and boys since she was little…
Hinako: What weird times we live in… What do children draw such hard lines between genders? Why do boys and girls have to be enemies? I was made fun of just for talking to boys at school. I could never understand that. I was an outcast. Sometimes I wanted to play dolls with the girls, but other times I wanted to play hide-and-seek with the boys. But the boys always saw me as a girl and didn’t let me join them. And the girls didn’t like that I played with boys, so they shunned me a lot. I think Junko used to say that I saw the world differently than others. But finally I was able to make a good friend who didn’t treat me like just some girl…
Shu (child): Hey! That’s your doll, right? You dropped it! Space Ops HQ, come in! We’ve spotted a huge UFO! Preparing to engage!
May 26th, 1960
Father: Idiot! How many times do I have to tell you?!
Mother: I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry…
Father: Did you even taste this?! It has no flavor! You’re making me drink mud! You can’t even do something simple like this?! What kind of a worthless woman can’t make miso soup?!
Hinako’s Shadow: Stop it! You do this all the time! Cut it out!
Father: Shut up! And don’t you DARE talk to your father that way! Stay out of this!
Hinako’s Shadow: Why do you tolerate this, mom?! Why don’t you stand up for yourself?! And you, dad! If you don’t like her soup, make your own! You’re good at cooking, aren’t you?!
Mother: Hinako, stop. Please don’t talk back to your father. I made a mistake. You just focus on getting to school.
Hinako’s Shadow: You didn’t do anything wrong! Dad’s the one who’s in the wrong here!
Mother: Hinako! Do NOT talk like that about your father! Get to school! Now!
Hinako: I hated my father… but I didn’t really like my mother either.
Shu: No need to see me home. See ya tomorrow, partner.
Hinako’s Shadow: Right, partner.
Shu: I like you the way you are now. You wouldn’t be you if you went with what others wanted.
Hinako’s Shadow: Yeah. I feel the same way.
Mother: Hinako? What was that loud noise?
Hinako’s Shadow: I have no idea. Maybe you’re hearing things?
Mother: Well, what did you think of the outfits? It’s cute, right?
Hinako’s Shadow: It’s like I told you before: cute clothes aren’t really my style. So please stop bringing me those kinds of outfits. It’s embarrassing.
Mother: Is that so? I guess I’ll give it to someone else, then.
Hinako’s Shadow: Yeah, do that.
Mother: What a shame. I thought it looked really good on you.
Hinako: It’s not Shu’s fault. This is what I wanted.
Junko: I had always thought that that’s just how things are. So when the offer for an arranged marriage came up, I thought, “Now it’s my turn.”
Hinako’s Shadow: Why did you choose to marry someone you didn’t know?
Junko: Well, our parents talked and brought in a matchmaker… and I was introduced to someone they felt was a good fit for me. Even though I had only just met this person, I could tell we would get along well. Marrying for love is nice, but love is blind. Once you’re family, it’s too late to worry about issues you have with your spouse.
Hinako’s Shadow: I still don’t understand what you and other women are talking about.
Junko: You want to have a happy marriage and lead a happy life, right?
Hinako’s Shadow: That’s where you’re wrong. That’s probably where me and you—me and everyone else—are different.
Junko: Different? How?
Hinako’s Shadow: I… I don’t think being happy is what matters most. I mean, I do WANT TO be happy. But there’s something more important than that.
Junko: And what’s that?
Hinako’s Shadow: Making my own decisions. I don’t want people to make me happy. I want to choose to be happy. Even if I end up miserable, if it’s because of what I chose on my own, then it’s all worth it. People always say a woman’s happy when she has a dependable husband and a bunch of kids. I don’t care if I never experience any of that for the rest of my life. What’s most important to me is not whether or not I’m happy, but if I can choose my own fate.
Junko: I have to admit, that all sounds an unrealistic ideal to me. But I don’t think you’re wrong about what you’re saying. In another hundred years… No, perhaps sooner than that… There will come a time when true happiness is choosing your own path, no matter the outcome. I obviously can’t live in that world… but I hope you can, Hinako.
Hinako: Happiness… is choosing your own path, no matter the outcome. Not choosing your own path is the opposite of happiness. I won’t be told what to do. My choices are my own.
April 7th, 1961
Father: You’re not keeping anything from us, are you?!
Hinako’s Shadow: I don’t know. Seriously don’t even remember.
Father: Hrmm… Ngh…
Mother: This is fine, dear, don’t you think? What’s the concern?
Father: Hrmm…
Mother: What did you think, Hinako?
Hinako’s Shadow: I dunno. I have no idea…
Mother: I figured. That’s understandable. Just try to gather your thoughts and think long and hard. Speak with your inner self and really hear what she has to say.
Hinako’s Shadow: I hate this!
Mother: What?
Hinako’s Shadow: No, no, NO! I’m not doing this!
Mother: What’s gotten into you, Hinako?
Hinako’s Shadow: I’ll tell you! I hate you, Mother!
Mother: What?!
Hinako’s Shadow: I said I hate you! I NEVER wanna be like you!
Hinako’s Shadow: Enough already!
Father: What?!
Mother: Hinako… You father, he—
Hinako’s Shadow: Stop sugarcoating it! I know, okay? ! It’s because of your debt, isn’t it?!
Father: What?! You little…!
Hinako’s Shadow: You were tricked by some fool! He took all your money and it’s your fault! Mom’s had to cut expenses! People were laughing at Junko because she had to wear old clothes! That money was for our family! It was to bring us just a little of happiness! So cut the crap and apologize! To me! To Junko! To Mother! Apologize for all the trouble you’ve caused us!
Father: HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT?!
Mother: Dear, please, don’t. Please. I beg you. Hinako, I’m sorry, but could you go to the grocery for me?
Hinako’s Shadow: But…!
Mother: I don’t care what you buy. Just go! Now!
Father: Let me go! I’ve had enough of this! Who the HELL does she think she’s talking to?!
Mother: Please calm down, dear. Relax…
Hinako: Women get treated… no differently than animals…
Shu: Are you serious? You’re kidding, right?
Hinako’s Shadow: Nope. Super serious.
Shu: I-I don’t remember that guy! Don’t even know him! First of all, where’s this coming from all of a sudden? I don’t get it!
Hinako’s Shadow: I don’t know what to do. What would you do, partner?
Shu: That, uh… That’s something you have to decide for yourself. It’s not really my place…
Hinako’s Shadow: It’s all so strange. Besides, I hate being treated like a girl. It doesn’t feel right for me, does it?
Shu: No…
Hinako’s Shadow: Right? I don’t think so either.
Shu: Don’t go jumping the gun just yet, though. You’ve got a bad habit of rushing things, y’know. Just take some more time to think things over. Calm down and listen to your inner self.
Hinako’s Shadow: You’re right. You’re absolutely right, partner. Hrrnnn…
Shu: You all right? Another headache? You tend to get those when you worry too much. Just take some medicine. Don’t let it get that bad.
Hinako’s Shadow: The stuff I bought doesn’t work at all.
Shu: Okay… Just leave it to me. I’ll find something that’ll work for you.
Hinako’s Shadow: Thanks, partner. I can always count on you.
Shu: Seriously. If you rush things, no matter what you choose, you’ll sure to regret it. Really give it some thought. Promise me you’ll do that.
Hinako’s Shadow: My sister said the same thing. You got it, partner. I promise.
Mother: Hinako, would you come over here? I would… like to correct some of your assumptions.
Hinako: Assumptions…?
Mother: I know that you think that I am too weak. That I smooth things over and never stand up to your father.
Hinako: No, I…
Mother: You father can be… ill-tempered sometimes, I know. But really, he’s just shy and acting strong in front of his daughters.
Hinako: And what about the times he yelled and threw things across the room?
Mother: You don’t know this, but your father had a long-time dream… He wanted to open a small shop with a friend.
Hinako: He did?
Mother: Yes. Your father had a friend who was very dear to him, from his time on the boat. He always said how they were as close as brothers. But one day… Something must have happened. He… took all of your father’s money and he disappeared.
Hinako: What?
Mother: I’m sure… he had his own reasons for what he did. He really did seem like a nice person. Your father, he was very hurt by that betrayal. And he couldn’t keep his anger inside. But even so… he would always apologize after he calmed down. And yet, he was reluctant to come off as a weak father. You should know what pride means to a man.
Hinako: But still, that’s no excuse for the pain he caused.
Mother: Hinako, I know you think that a married woman is supposed to subject herself to her husband’s abuse. But you know, married women aren’t as weak or helpless as you think we are. Your father might put on a tough face in front of you two, but when you’re not around, he’s a whole different man. We… Your mother and father got into a big fight once.
Hinako: Really? I never knew that.
Mother: That time, I completely ignored him until he came to apologize. I acted normally when you two were around, of course. Not only that… I made his meals out of all the food that he hates, and for the tea that I gave him?… I wrung dirty rags into it.
Hinako: You did? I don’t believe it…
Mother: Your father… He caved in just three days. After you and Junko went to bed… he bowed low, right over there, head to the floor.
Hinako: Dad did that? Really…?
Mother: Sure he did. Whenever your father and I got into a serious argument, he knew that against me he never had a chance. But Hinako, that was just how life went with the two of us. I’m sorry for making you worry. I’m so sorry. From the bottom of my heart, I truly am.
Hinako: Thank you for telling me… all of it… mom.
October 6th, 1962
Mother: Hinako! Shu’s on the phone!
Hinako’s Shadow: Tell him I’m not home!
Mother: I already told him you’re here.
Hinako’s Shadow: Then tell him I’m heading out shopping or something!
Mother: Okay, okay. I’ll tell him.
Mother: Hinako! I know you’re in there, say something! I said Shu’s here!
Shu: Hey, partner. How’re you feeling?
Hinako’s Shadow: How am I feeling? I’m feeling fine, I guess.
Shu: You’ve had your head in the clouds lately at school. You always zone out when we talk. Figured you might be stressed out and getting those awful headaches again.
Hinako’s Shadow: Not at all.
Shu: …Really?
Hinako’s Shadow: Yeah. You worry too much. Sorry. I’m going to the bathroom.
Shu: Okay… Her mom said she’s been reading something in secret. Is this… what she’s been reading? Sorry. I saw it behind the dresser.
Hinako’s Shadow: Did you read it?
Shu: Huh?
Hinako’s Shadow: You didn’t read it, did you? Just forget it. There’s nothing to do with you.
Shu: I didn’t read it. I mean, there wasn’t even anything…
Hinako’s Shadow: Could you just go home? I’m not feeling that great right now.
Shu: You, uh… You…
Hinako’s Shadow: Just go.
Shu: Sure. You got it. See you tomorrow…
Father: Hinako. Can we talk?
Hinako’s Shadow: What do you want?
Father: I… I wanted to apologize to you.
Hinako’s Shadow: For what?
Father: I’ve been a horrible father. For the longest time… I yelled at you, scared you… I’m sorry.
Hinako’s Shadow: You’re apologizing for that NOW?! You think that’s just gonna erase what you did?! You made us all suffer for so long!
If you’ve locked in “Coming Home to Roost” Ending
Hinako’s Shadow: You can see me, right? Now you can even hear my voice. Don’t just stand there. Come in. I have something I want to talk to you about.
Hinako: Tell me. Who are you…?
Hinako’s Shadow: I think it’s weird too. To not have a grasp of yourself, to not understand your own feelings.
Hinako: What do you mean? What are you talking about?
Hinako’s Shadow: I think… you’re me, but I’m not you. That’s my guess.
Hinako: But who are you? I am Hinako, but who does that make you?
Hinako’s Shadow: I’m also Hinako, although… I might not have Shimizu Hinako’s heart and mind anymore.
Hinako: You’re not making any sense at all! What the hell are you talking about?!
Hinako’s Shadow: Then stop playing dumb with me! Why are you acting like this, like you don’t know what’s going on? Hey, look at me—look at me! Use your head and think! Think about it! I could’ve killed you off at any time! But I didn’t! Any idea why?! Because I’m serious! Shimizu Hinako, I wanted to talk to you! We have to fight. You and I: a fight to the death as equals! But all you do is run away! Running and running… You’re not even trying to take any of this seriously! If you’re going to keep running like this, then fine! I’m going to kill you, once and for all! Oh, and it’s not going to end with you! I’m going to kill mom and dad too! And this house — this whole town’s going with them! Rinko and Sakuko are next! And of course… your precious partner as well.
Hinako: Where is he?! Where is Shu?!
Hinako’s Shadow: Hey… Is Shu really that special? He still just treats you as his pal to play Space Wars with, right? He doesn’t even see you as a woman! He is some guy you grew up with! His death won’t matter one bit!
Hinako: You’re wrong! He’s my friend, he’s special, my one and only partner! I won’t let you kill him!
If you’ve locked in “Fox’s Wedding” Ending
Hinako’s Shadow: You can see me, right? Now you can even hear my voice. Don’t just stand there. Come in. I have something I want to talk to you about.
Hinako: Tell me. Who are you…?
Hinako’s Shadow: Please… Just die.
Hinako: Huh…?
Hinako’s Shadow: If I ask you to… Would you please just die?
Hinako: You… Why do you want…?
Hinako’s Shadow: If Shimizu Hinako dies… Then I might be reborn as someone else.
Hinako: You want to be someone other than me? Why don’t you want to live as me?
Hinako’s Shadow: The good things in life, the bad things… Everything you value, or you hate… I thought about it. And all of it just… lead to despair. No… Let me put it in a more positive way. You can’t live like a baby bird forever. The days living in the nest as a baby bird, getting fed by mommy bird and daddy bird and playing with your friends… Those won’t last forever. Once winter comes around, the parents will fly away and abandon the nest. Your friends, once they learn to fly, will take wing and disappear. There’ll be nothing left. Every nest will be empty. Your parents, your friends… Everyone’ll leave you behind! You’ll be all alone!
Hinako: Stop.
Hinako’s Shadow: The happiness you have now, and the lonely winter that’s bound to come. Everything. I’ve done all the math. I’ve thought it all through.
Hinako: Stop. Don’t, it’s too much, no…
Hinako’s Shadow: I get it. It’s terrible. It’s scary. But the scariest part? What if winter—
Hinako: I don’t want to hear it! I don’t know! I don’t want to know! I don’t wanna think about it!
Hinako’s Shadow: So that’s it? Your decision is to just cover your ears and screams?! If that’s what you’re going to do, then you’ll just have to die! No mercy! No remorse! Don’t want to? Then show me! Prove to me that you don’t want to die, that you want to live! No more running away! No more covering your ears! Finish me off for good so you can keep on living!
Hinako: Why don’t YOU kill ME?! You said you’d be happy with me gone, but can you even do it?! You’re scared, aren’t you?!
Hinako’s Shadow: Yeah, I’m scared. I’m terrified. Someone who’s kind today… They might turn into a completely different person tomorrow! I mean, even… even dad used to laugh and smile before. But… running, succumbing to fear, it’s not a decision! Open your eyes! Don’t stop thinking about this! Don’t ever let other people decide what happiness is for you! Shimizu Hinako… You may be a baby bird, but you still have wings! I’ll give you all the courage you need… So you give me your wings!
Hinako: Kotoyuki….
If you’ve locked in “The Fox Wets Its Tail” Ending
Hinako’s Shadow: Is something wrong with me? My mind, I mean. Something… feels off. And this feeling keeps growing, getting faster and weirder. Sakuko told me that this feeling I’m experiencing is love… but is that really it? I always imagined love as a warm and bittersweet sort of feeling. And it kind of… kind of tickles… That’s how I always thought of it. But that’s… not what I’m feeling right now at all. It feels a little warm, and maybe even bittersweet, I guess… But it’s like someone’s grabbed my leg. Like… like they’re dragging me down to the bottom of a swamp… That’s what it’s like. It feels comforting. But I… I can’t shake this fear that’s lurking somewhere in my heart. Is this really what love is? Maybe I’m just different. What do you think? Well? Tell me. Tell me!
Hinako: I… I don’t know. B-but… I do know one thing. What you’re feeling is probably… not the same thing that you felt for Shu. Something… more twisted.
Hinako’s Shadow: Well, I guess… Both of us are Hinako, but… I think… one of us has to be wrong. Please… Listen. If I’m the one who’s wrong, then kill me! Kill me now! If you don’t… Then I’LL have to kill YOU!
If you’ve locked in “Ebisugaoka In Silence” Ending
Hinako’s Shadow: You seriously think that gets you off the hook?
Father: Now, I know it’s not enough. I know… you can’t forgive me. I understand. I truly do. But please… at least let me apologize. It’s okay if you don’t forgive me.
Hinako’s Shadow: Huh!? You’re just apologizing because you want to feel better about yourself! I won’t have it! Get out of here! Even now, I’m terrified that you might blow up and throw a knife at me again!
Father: I’m sorry. I believed… that a proper father should be feared by his children. I was wrong.
Hinako’s Shadow: Well, there’s no taking it back now, is there? Get out. GET OUT OF MY LIFE!
Hinako: Listen to him… He’s actually apologizing.
Hinako’s Shadow: Huh…?
Hinako: Whether or not we forgive him is up to us. Even so… I think it’s important for us to hear him out. At least he’s sorry!
Hinako’s Shadow: Why should it matter to me if he’s sorry?!
Hinako: Because… he’s family. You heard Mom, right? Dad was betrayed by a friend. He was suffering.
Hinako’s Shadow: Oh, he was suffering, so I’m just supposed to forgive him? I won’t! I refuse!
Hinako: Yeah. You’re absolutely right. You don’t have to forgive him. And you don’t… have to listen to any of his excuses or apologies either. But still! Like it or not, he’s family! And so… even if you can’t let it go, just let him speak! He’s still our father. And we’re still his daughter!
Hinako’s Shadow: Maybe Mom could forgive him for what he’s done, but I can’t! I won’t!
Hinako: You know… you and I are bound to Dad by ties of blood. That Mom and Dad don’t share that bond. Mom’s only bound by marriage. Yet she still listened to him. She even had the courage to forgive him. We should listen to him. His own flesh and blood, should be willing to hear him out? I know you’re scared of him. I’m scared, too. I know you can’t forget what he did. And maybe he doesn’t deserve a clean slate. But please… I am begging you to listen to him. Not just for his sake, but for your sake too. Please, just listen!
Father: If I… if what I did… taught you to fear men, to never trust them… then I was a poor teacher. I might be hopeless, but not all fathers are. Kotoyuki isn’t like me. He is… an upstanding young man. He can give you a good life, a happy life, I’m sure of it. Your old friend Shu is a respectable man, too. I always thought the two of you could build a happy home together. But no… how I feel about any of it is beside the point. It’s your choice to get married or not. And I’ll support your choice. I don’t… expect you to forgive me. But I want you to be free of this curse of mine. I just want you to be happy! I’m so… so sorry!
Hinako: I’m still scared… and I still don’t forgive you. But at least I finally… understand you.